49th Heartbeat
LOVE IS BEYOND DEATH
Few years ago, I have read the narrative of a woman who went to the cemetery in order to visit her deceased grandparents and noticed an elderly man struggling to tidy up a dilapidated grave with his bare hands. Out of concern, she came near him and offered her help which he accepted cheerfully. In the course of their conversation, the woman found out that the elderly man was actually cleaning the grave of his mother, who died at a very young age of 21, because of so many complications after she gave birth. At 77, the elderly man had no idea about his mother. In order that he could picture out what his mother looked like, he would just stare at the vintage frame that adorned the small pictures of a very beautiful woman who seemed to be at the peak of her youth, whose gleaming innocence defied all of pains and excruciations she was experiencing at that very moment. It was actually the last picture of his mother taken few months before she gave birth to him.
Every year, this elderly man would go to the cemetery, pull out all the weeds and vines that blocked the little space around the grave, offer a basket of flowers and say a short prayer in memory of his beloved mother. The woman who had a hearty exchange of pleasantries with this elderly man admired his ardent devotion to his mother. Though they never really met, the man seemed to be so close to his mother’s heart and their love for each other was even beyond death. With much hope and eagerness, the woman looked forward for another chance that they would meet again so that she could listen to some more stories from the old man.
A year later, the woman came back to the cemetery on All Soul’s Day, and looked for her elderly friend. She waited for a couple of hours but she never saw the old man entered the gate. She then decided to go to the burial place of the old man’s mother in order to meet him there.But as soon as she reached the place, she was surprised at what she saw. There were two tombs already and she was deeply saddened when she read what was written on the second gravestone. It was the name of the elderly man. He died few months after they met at that very same place. But despite her grief, she was consoled upon realizing that her friend, who didn’t have a slightest recollection about his mother, has finally seen her in heaven. In her musing, she told herself that maybe, they will have to spend a lot of time together because they have to catch up for the many lost moments. After the long and meandering years of waiting, they had their much deserved reunion.
Before she left the place, she smiled, as she gave herself a deep sigh upon reading the short but significant thought inscribed at the lower portion of the gravestone:
“The elderly son finally meets his youthful mother”
Love is indeed, beyond death.
P.S.
Have a meaningful visit to your deceased loved ones at the cemetery.There is no such thing as distance to persons who love and who are loved.
48th Heartbeat
SA MGA UTOD KO NGA PAGA ORDINAHAN
In my column this week, my words are rather short because I just want to have a share in the joys and excitement of my fellow brothers who will be ordained priests on Monday, October 26. I am really looking forward to this day, because it will also be an opportunity for me to renew the promises that I have made before God and before the believing community a year ago, when I too, made a firm decision to consecrate myself to a life of celibacy, obedience, self-denial and humble service. The Archdiocese is indeed blessed to have ten new priests this year: an enduring proof that our abiding prayers, our eager nurturance and selfless support to those who have aspired to follow the call for priesthood really paid off in the end.
“Nagikan sa komunidad, igabalik sa komunidad!” The ordinandi will soon be reporting to their respective parish assignments, with hearts smouldered by the fire of God’s love, as they serve different communities- guiding, assisting, accompanying, ministering, and leading the flock entrusted to them. The task will not be easy in the course of time but it will definitely be rewarding!
Few years ago, I came across this well-written, provocative and consoling poem that described the enduring effects of those two healing hands of a priest on the lives of people. I do believe that this will also serve as an invitation for all of us to continue to pray for more vocations, for more laborers in God’s vineyard.
The Beautiful Hands of a Priest
We need them in life’s early morning,
We need them again at its close;
We feel their warm clasp of true friendship,
We seek it while tasting life’s woes.
When we come to this world we are sinful,
The greatest as well as the least.
And the hands that make us pure as angels
Are the beautiful hands of a priest.
At the altar each day we behold them,
And the hands of a king on his throne
Are not equal to them in their greatness
Their dignity stands all alone.
For there in the stillness of morning
Ere the sun has emerged from the east,
There God rests between the pure fingers
Of the beautiful hands of a priest.
When we are tempted and wander
To pathways of shame and sin
‘Tis the hand of a priest that absolve us.
Not once but again and again.
And when we are taking life’s partner
Other hands may prepare us a feast
But the hands that will bless and unite us,
Are the beautiful hands of a priest.
God bless them and keep them all holy,
For the Host which their fingers caress,
What can a poor sinner do better
Than to ask Him who chose them to bless
When the death dews on our lids are falling,
May our courage and strength be increased
By seeing raised o’er us in blessing
The beautiful hands of a priest.
To Reverends Ron, Peter, Nathaniel, Ricky, Pedro, Ian Neil, Solithur, Yves, Luben, and Joemar, congratulations in advance. Continue to bask in the love of God and by all means share that love to those whom you will serve. Welcome to the presbyterium!
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47th Heartbeat
“SAWSAW”
One particular word that certainly catches my attention is “saw-saw”. I am not really proficient in Tagalog or Hiligaynon grammar and my understanding would always be limited on the occasions that I use them (or sometimes, aided by persons who are experts in the proper usage of certain terms, which are quite confusing especially when they are being referred to various instances), but I like to play around with definitions of vernacular terms.
In human interaction, the term “saw-saw” is already overrated. It has a lot of meanings and implications. I remember one time, when we were having our pastoral planning for BEC in the seminary, one seminarian commented, “Nami gid guro kung may ara kita kuntani sang konkreto nga plano sa BEC kay basi bala ‘saw-saw saw-saw’ lang ang himuon naton didto”. True enough, “saw-saw” can be understood in the context of a cliché, wherein you just have to involve yourself in a conversation, but not alleviating the situation or contributing to the solution of a problem. In the course of time, this term actually evolved into something negative because in the technical sense of the word, based on popular usage, “saw-saw” would simply mean to pry, to meddle or to participate in a conversation which you are not actually part of. In short, “saw-saw” has been synonymous to “chismis”. I must admit that there were instances that I also had this notion of “saw-saw”. Hence, I got confused about the appropriate term that I should use if I would go for the depth of the experience. Sometimes, I’d like to use the term “makibabad” or “hulom-hulom” because they are more profound and appealing, but later on, I’ve figured out that they would also mean the same thing.
What does “saw-saw” really mean?
If I go back to its etymology, it would basically refer to an act of dipping one’s food to a “sawsawan”, a condiment made of vinegar, soy sauce (or fish sauce), kalamansi, onions, garlic, and hot peppers, which is a traditional Filipino custom of adding spice to that seemingly bland dish. In every street or corridor, there are a lot gastronomic specialties that are usually coupled with various sauces and dips. I know that oftentimes, it is just a matter of choice, but one could only satisfy his cravings whenever there’s an added zest or zing that would tickle his or her palate. Put it concretely, “Kung magbakal ka sang fishball, barbecue, ukon isaw, may ara gid ya nga sawsawan. Puwede ka kapili sang sabor nga gusto mo- matam-is, maaslom, maalat-alat, ukon makahang”.
This concept, in all its naivety, should really be the definition of the term “saw-saw”, meaning to plunge or to delve into something which an individual values the most.
During our Urban Poor Trial in Payatas, my classmate and I would complain on the outcome of our pastoral program since we were doing nothing for the entire day. We thought to ourselves that we were only there in order to be a burden to our host families who were struggling with poverty and survival. In our earnestness, we concluded that it could’ve been better if there was a specific program that we implemented so that we could have been of great help to the community. At a certain point, our idea was noble and productive but later, we figured out that we were only catering to our own needs and expectations, by trying to impose an ideal which was not actually expected or asked of us.
Looking back, it dawned on me that this is another nuance of the term “saw-saw”. I go to my area of ministry not just for the sole reason of making a difference in people’s lives by my initiatives, but the first thing that I should is to make my presence felt. Inasmuch as I would insist on my idealisms, at times, people would only ask me to have a watchful eye, a listening ear, and a prudent judgment in order that I may have a better grasp of their situation. Inasmuch as “saw-saw” would require transcendence over time, my experience with the marginalized taught me how to be open to a lot of possibilities by paying attention to the various dichotomies experienced by the people I met along the way. I know that my initial desire is to help and to make a change but it is still better not to assume at all, because there will be instances when all they ever ask of me are my sincerity in dealing with them and my willingness to listen to their various litanies in life— whether their spouses have left them for another partner, or their children have left school because of vices, or their despair in looking for jobs to sustain their family, or their “helplessness” in coping with the harshness of miserly life.
Therefore, as what the original etymology would suggest, I am able to savor the various “spices” of life by learning how to condescend with people and to come together as a community. This has added flavor to my own life as well as I continuously affirm this fact in every visit to my area of apostolate. “Sa padayon ko nga nga pangin saw-saw sa lain-lain nga sawsawan sang kabuhi, may bag-o na naman nga sabor sa akon nga panan-aw nahanungod sa akon mga kautoran sa komunidad kag sa nagapadayon nga kabuhi diri sa kalibutan”
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” (Leo Buscaglia)
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